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I’ve struggled with my weight my whole life. I’ve never been grossly overweight, in my opinion, but there has always been weight to lose. I’d guess that I first started “dieting” when I was in elementary school which is just crazy. What 8 year old should be worried about their weight? Well, I was.

Back in high school was when I first tried Weight Watchers. I got down to 145 which was about 10 ;pounds lower than my normal weight. I quickly gained it back like I always do. Ever since then when I want to lose weight I join Weight Watchers. It really is a good program. You keep your points in check, you have weekly points that are optional to use and you lose weight.

However, I tend to get in this mode where I’m very excited and I track every single day. I love tracking. I plug in my food as I’m eating it, I’m that excited. Then the honeymoon period is over and after a few months of that I get bored and it becomes a waste of money. Well I am now at that point again. So I quit. Just like that.

Here’s the thing: I should be able to tell if I’m over eating or eating something terrible. I know it whether I’m tracking points or not, it’s just whether I hold myself accountable or not. That veggie burger I had for lunch? Probably not the best thing in the world. But I didn’t track it because I already knew that and tonight I walked 2 miles and am having a light dinner. Balance. Moderation. I’m still learning, but I’m a hell of a lot closer to it than I was several years ago.

One thing that excites me about our new house is that when we move in we’ll have a clean slate. I’ll be able to go grocery shopping for natural, organic, healthy food. Blaine doesn’t care what we eat as long as it tastes good so it will be easy to keep stock of quality food.

In the meantime, I’m counting on myself to just trust my mind to decide what is best for my body to consume. Sure, I’ll still eat veggie burgers and hot cheetos with bananas (I’m famous for that weird combo), but I’ll also have asparagus for dinner like I am tonight.

Balance. Moderation. I’m getting there.

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